priligy generico

Ligua Stupid

Zombie Killer

I have no desire to sound completely insensitive to the tragedy involved here, so let’s just dispel that notion from the start. I may be thoughtless and insensitive, as some would happily suggest, but I do sometimes have my limitations. So when I read this headline a couple of weeks ago – a little nugget I’d found a link to through Facebook – I did so with great horror, not for the tragedy, but for the worst abuse of English I’ve seen in a while:

14-Year-Old Boy From Detroit Shoots His Mother Dead 10 Times As She Slept After She Tried To Keep Him Away From A Gang!

How does someone who writes at such an infantile level as this even have a job in any form of media? It ranks along side the

Indiana baby found in field after tornado dies

headline splashed in all its clumsy glory across the front page of a local paper after a recent spate of violent storms and high winds. And, again, not mocking the tragedy – only the abysmal misuse of language to describe it.

But let’s break down the initial headline, shall we?

Apparently a 14-year-old boy from Detroit wanted to join a gang.  His mother wisely told him ‘no.’ Then, a hard day’s parenting finished, the mother decided to take a nap. As she rested, her son took out a gun (presumably found lying round the house), and shot and killed her. The mother came back to life, possibly with the intent of scolding the boy for either shooting her dead or for having disrupted her nap, whereupon he shot and killed her again. This scenario played out a further 8 times until the woman finally succumbed. Or she finally took a headshot which, as anyone knows, is the only true way to kill a zombie.

Perhaps a more appropriate headline ought to have been

Detroit woman identified as Patient Zero in zombie apocalypse.

Oblivionnihilious

When someone says they’re planning to drink so much that they will be ‘obliviated,’ do they actually mean to say ‘obliterated?’ Or do they perhaps mean to say they will become ‘oblivious,’ or ‘annihilated,’ or some combination of the two?

Or perhaps they’re just idiots.

Proofreadng 101-B

Attempted internet memes about the checking of spelling, grammar, or punctuation are often much more effective when someone actually checks the spelling, grammar, or punctuation of their meme before they send it out into the cold, harsh world…

meme-thing

 

 

Benefit Analysis

In continuing to seek a job which does not crush my will to live, I have applied quite a number of times to a local company whom I shall not name because they have simply annoyed me with their Wall of Silence but which might sound as though it could start with a ‘V’ sound and end with something similar to ‘era Bradley.’ After years of having struggled with alcoholism and being fired from every job he’d ever had, a long-time friend of mine got a position with this company the day after he walked out of rehab. And yet, with far more experience than he could ever hope to have, every application I have submitted has been resoundingly ignored and my telephone enquiries to their answerphone go unreturned.

Recently they posted a position for their e-commerce division which, amongst other basic duties, included proof-reading. I believe I am simply going to copy the image below (culled from a stop at Amazon.com the other day) and attach it to an email in lieu of a formal application…

heater