priligy generico

Almost But Not Quite the Next Food Network Star Anyway

As long time readers of this blog (yes, I mean both of you) know, I tend to have a bit of a love/hate relationship with Food Network. Well, yeah, I have a bit of a love/hate relationship with almost everything, but especially the Food Network. And Iron Chef. That’s more of a hate/hate relationship.

Anyway… I had some free time lately, now the fall term is over, and I’ve spent some quality time falling desperately in love with Laura Calder and wondering how effective a move to Halifax might be. I’ve also noticed that Jeffrey Saad, one of the non-winners of series five of The Next Food Network Star, now has his own show on The Cooking Channel (Tuesday nights at 9.30), called The United Tastes of America, in which he goes round ‘seeking the most iconic foods across America and showing you how they’re being reinvented.’ Or, as he says, ‘Enjoying your favourite foods on a-whole-nuther level.’ Really? A-whole-nuther? Thanks, Jeff.

I’ve found it interesting to note, of late, the various not quite winners of The Next Food Network Star who have found success even though they are not officially Food Network Stars. Adam Gertler, who was my pick to win series four, seems to have started the trend. In all fairness, though, I suppose it was really Nathan Lyon, from series two, who can claim that victory. Of course he re-emerged on Discovery and not on Food Network or an affiliate. Adam did Will Work For Food and Kid in a Candy Store for Food Network and has hosted a few specials here and there. It was nice to see that Food Network recognised his talent and gave him an opportunity despite his losing to Dark Lord of The Sith Bobby Flay’s minion Aaron ‘Big Daddy’ McCargo jr.

Sadly, Commander Lisa, the other non-winner of series four, appears to only have a web site to her credit. Of course Carissa Seward, yet another non-winner of series two, who lost to bowling shirt aficionado, Guy Fieri , seems never to have made the jump back to television either. And neither has Reggie. Fortunately.

Kelsey Nixon, whom I was particularly crushed to see shown the Stairwell to Oblivion on series four, now has her own show, Kelsey’s Essentials, also on Cooking Channel, and, as I mentioned somewhere in this rambling mess of a blog, Tom Pizzica got a show of his own despite losing to Aarti Sequeira earlier this year.

Although I still think Outrageous Food is Food Network’s rip-off of Travel Channel’s Man v Food.

So when Bob Tuschman admonishes contestants that, like the Highlander, there can be only one Next Food Network star, he only means it in sort of a relative and non-committal way. Sure, you’ll get that coveted early Sunday morning spot that most people are too hung over to wake up for and maybe you’ll make an appearance on the next Next Food Network Star to gush over how winning has changed your life, but that’s only if everyone else really sucks. Maybe.

I can’t mention the contentious series three, as I am still bitter over Amy’s premature and unfair elimination, her triumphant return, and immediate shove into obscurity as Food Network did their very best to ensure no-one would ever watch her programme which, in turn, was partially responsible for her swift departure. As for cry-baby Sith Lord wannabe, JAG… yeah, he’s still a punk-ass little bitch. He should probably hook up with Debbie Lee

Leave a Reply